Ultimately our beliefs are what will make or break us

By Nina Steele 

I discovered spirituality about 11 years ago. At the time I didn’t know what it was called or what I was looking for, all I had was a strong feeling that there was more to life than the enjoyment of material possessions. Although my life had now moved beyond mere survival since moving to the UK, I still felt a deep void within and I knew that I would not find peace until I found the answers necessary to fill that void. Since no one I knew was into spirituality, I had to make the initial journey of discovery alone.

I knew of people who were into religion as I was raised a Catholic, however I felt strongly that religion was not the answer for me. For example, I no longer believed that my sins could somehow be dissolved by just prayers or that I had to pray to a higher power outside of myself. Not only had it become obvious that the nourishment my soul needed could not be found in material possessions alone, I also had the feeling that it was up to me how my life turned out, and the many books on spirituality I would end up reading confirmed these truths.

Indeed searching for the truth meant reading a lot, and books by Deepak Chopra and Eckhart Tolle were instrumental in my quest. You know the truth when you hear it and that is exactly how it felt the more I read. I was now faced with a major challenge in that I now had to undo all the layers of misinformation I was fed growing up. And although I have managed to rid myself of many over the years, I know that this is my life’s work. I will still be working at it until the day I die.

I doubt that anyone can say with absolute certainty that they know everything about life and that they no longer need to learn. We learn every single day and our beliefs are tested accordingly. My Spiritual beliefs allow me to live my life consciously and I am aware that ultimately, it is up to me whether I am happy or unhappy. My choices are what will determine whether I rise or fall. Indeed, before, I wasn’t aware that my choices were literally creating my reality and knowing that now means I can choose carefully.

Spirituality has helped me develop a set of strong values that have come to define who I am and I always strive to remain true to those values. I have come to realise that to dilute those values in order to fit in or please others ultimately end up making me unhappy. And so spirituality played a key role in helping me come to terms with not having children by giving me the tools to accept my path wholeheartedly.

This is not the kind of message that you are likely to find in the mainstream media, where we are still led to believe that we will be happy if we conform to a certain stereotype. Having said that, it will be wrong to blame the media alone for all the unhappiness in society, for ultimately, people are responsible for their own lives.

I could have for example bought into the ongoing myth that we are not complete until we become parents and made myself miserable for the rest of my life. Instead, I chose to accept that not all paths are meant to include children and I have found peace that way. Which is why I believe that ultimately, our beliefs are what will make or break us.


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