Has not having children affected your relationship?

By Nina Steele 

We have been quite fortunate in that our relationship has grown stronger through the years and so we went through this whole experience as a tight unit. Whenever the strain of the whole process started to weigh heavily on the shoulders of one of us, the other would step in to offer support. A strong relationship is therefore vital in such circumstances.

For example in cases where the fact that a couple is unable to have children is the result of infertility problems experienced by one half of the relationship, it is paramount for the other not to become bitter and start pointing fingers. The only outcome for this is to make the person with the problem carry a sense of guilt, which can be detrimental to the whole relationship in the long term. This is of course if the relationship matters more than having children, which in our case it did.

Childless couples


  1. GemmaRowlands says

    If both of you didn’t want to have children, then I would say that your relationship could go from strength to strength without them in the future. However, if one of you was simply saying that you didn’t in order to avoid upsetting your partner then there is a high chance that this would cause issues. I would say that the vital thing here is that you should always be true to yourself, and avoid saying things that you don’t mean, because it will only cause problems in the future.

  2. In a way, I think that it has. Most of my friends at the moment are stressed about buying a house or saving up for a family, and my partner and I don’t have that at all. Instead, we are able to do whatever we like with the money that we earn, and we can see and do things without having to worry about wasting money that could have been meant for anything else. So it has affected it in a positive way, I think, because we have much more time for each other.

  3. Julez Fitzmond says

    Not really, because he was my friend during the time when I realised that I couldn’t have children. In fact, he never really wanted them anyway, so I think he was almost thrilled and thought that our relationship would be ideal. It’s a strange thing to bond over, but I am just glad that I have somebody who understands what to expect from me, and who isn’t going to dump me over it.

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