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Being childfree gives me the chance to live my life the way I want to

By Vaughan Edwards 

The childfree life is a happy life for me. People out there seem to focus a lot more on women who are childfree by circumstance or by choice, there is less focus on men who are childfree. I just never felt that burning desire to have children that we often hear about, and the older I get, the less appeal I see in having children. I have recently turned 30.

For starters, children can cost a great deal. Not just financially, but also mentally, socially, physically and emotionally.

A prime example of how much impact children can have on one’s life, is holidays. They are never quite the same when you’ve got kids with you all the time. When you decide to have children, you have to make a great deal of sacrifice, and naturally, not everyone wants to see their lives turned upside down.

To many people for whom parenthood is everything, people like me who choose not to have children, are often judged negatively and have been labelled “selfish”. Even the Pope, who you would have thought would know better not to judge others, has called the childfree selfish as well! This is a key example of “The pot calling the kettle black”. I myself would never dream of negatively judging anybody who has or wants to have children of their own. Ultimately, it is all about choice.

Not having children means that I am free to make life plans without having to worry about the impact of my actions on any dependants. For example, I have often toyed with the idea of moving abroad to Australia or New Zealand, to follow in the footsteps of my second cousin, who moved to one of these shores in 1998. Had I been a parent, chances are that, I might have balked at the idea.

For the time being however, as a UK resident, my hope is to start a meetup group for the childfree. It will be for both men and women. It is something that has been at the back of my mind for some time now.

In spite of societal pressures and the stigma towards those without children, I hope we childfree people can celebrate life the best we can. I for one am trying everything in my power to do just that.

Autism and childlessness

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