It wasn’t Gloria Gaynor’s choice not to have children but she has accepted it

By Nina Steele 

Whenever Gloria Gaynor’s name is mentioned, her now world famous song “I will Survive” inevitably comes to mind. At a time when we are used to singers being successful for a short period of time, that she is still earning a living as one, thanks to the continued success of that song, first released in 1978, is quite remarkable. On a personal note, she is 69 and has no children. She did want children to begin with but as is often the case, life had other plans. She said this in a recent article for the Guardian about not having children: “Having children was always something I wanted, but my ex-husband was just never interested. It’s funny, I was the only one of my siblings who always wanted kids, yet I’m the only one who didn’t have them. I’ve come to terms with it now, plus I wouldn’t have wanted to raise them in a broken marriage”.

I have to admit that I was pleasantly surprised about her openness on the issue of her childlessness. It’s always refreshing to hear famous people say it like it is, as far as this subject is concerned, because they have clout and the power to change people’s perception. Also, even though not having children was not a choice, she refrains from making herself into a victim by blaming her ex-husband, who she says didn’t want children.

I have come across many stories of women who stayed with a man, even though he made it clear he didn’t want children. And then, when the relationship ended, and it was too late to have children, they went on to make themselves into victims, by blaming their ex. Of course it is dishonest on their part. That they never had the courage to walk away is the real issue. But of course admitting that would be opening a whole can of worms and they would rather take what they see as the easy way out, which blaming others for our own choices, always is.

By telling the world how she came to be a woman without children, and how she has made peace with it, Gloria Gaynor is showing the type of strength that her famous song talks about. Her story of acceptance is even more inspiring considering that she ended up the only one among her siblings not to have children, when she was the only one who wanted them to begin with.